The Dangers of Ego in Leadership – Lessons from Narcissus

The Dangers of Ego in Leadership – Lessons from Narcissus

By Mark Wager

This article is inspired by my new book, Wisdom of the Gods, available for sale now. In the book, I explore timeless leadership lessons drawn from ancient myths, revealing how these stories continue to shape our understanding of power, influence, and decision-making. One of the most relevant myths for leaders today is the story of Narcissus, a cautionary tale about the dangers of unchecked ego.

The Double-Edged Sword of Ego

Ego is often a double-edged sword in leadership. On one hand, self-confidence is essential. Leaders must believe in their abilities, have conviction in their decisions, and inspire others to follow their vision. However, when self-confidence crosses into arrogance, it blinds leaders to the needs of others, damages relationships, and leads to poor decision-making. The myth of Narcissus serves as a powerful warning about the consequences of unchecked ego in leadership and the importance of self-awareness and humility.

The Myth of Narcissus

In Greek mythology, Narcissus was a young man of extraordinary beauty, admired by all who saw him. Yet, he was indifferent to the affection of others, believing himself superior to everyone around him. One day, while wandering through the woods, he came across a still pool of water. As he leaned over to drink, he saw his reflection for the first time and became captivated by his own image. So enamoured with his own beauty, he could not pull himself away. He remained by the pool, staring at his reflection, until he wasted away, unable to focus on anything else.

This myth is a striking metaphor for what happens when ego consumes a leader. Just as Narcissus became obsessed with his reflection, ego-driven leaders become fixated on their own image and personal success, losing sight of the bigger picture. They stop listening to others, resist feedback, and make decisions based on their own desires rather than the needs of their team or organisation.

The Dangers of Ego in Leadership

From my experience coaching leaders, I have seen firsthand how damaging unchecked ego can be. Many leaders begin their journey with the right intentions—focused on serving their teams and achieving shared goals. However, as they experience success, some begin to believe that their way is the only way, that their achievements are entirely their own doing, and that they no longer need the input of others. This mindset isolates them, leading to poor decision-making and a loss of trust from their teams.

Ego also creates blind spots. When leaders become too focused on themselves, they start to overlook critical details or dismiss the concerns of others. Just as Narcissus ignored everything around him, ego-driven leaders fail to see the challenges their teams face, creating frustration, disengagement, and declining performance.

The Power of Self-Awareness

One of the most important lessons from the myth of Narcissus is the need for self-awareness. Narcissus was so focused on his own reflection that he failed to see how his actions affected himself and those around him. Similarly, leaders who are consumed by their ego often lack awareness of the impact of their decisions. They become disconnected from their teams and lose sight of the broader mission.

Self-aware leaders reflect on their behaviour, understand their motivations, and remain open to feedback. However, many leaders struggle with this. Some see feedback as a threat to their authority rather than an opportunity to improve. The best leaders, however, embrace feedback, using it to grow and enhance their effectiveness.

The Importance of Humility

If ego is the problem, humility is the solution. Humble leaders recognise that leadership is not about personal glory but about empowering others, fostering collaboration, and ensuring the organisation’s success. Humility allows leaders to remain open to new ideas, accept when they are wrong, and acknowledge the contributions of others.

In my coaching practice, I help leaders develop humility by shifting their focus from personal success to team success. Leaders who make this shift often find that their teams become more engaged, motivated, and innovative. By giving credit where it is due and focusing on collective achievements, humble leaders create a culture of trust and collaboration.

The Power of Listening

Another key lesson from the myth of Narcissus is the importance of listening. Narcissus ignored the people around him, just as ego-driven leaders dismiss valuable insights from their teams. Leaders who fail to listen miss out on critical feedback, innovative ideas, and early warning signs of problems. This not only stifles creativity but also makes team members feel undervalued and disengaged.

Listening is one of the most powerful tools a leader can use to keep their ego in check. By actively seeking input, asking for feedback, and considering different perspectives, leaders can avoid the trap of believing they have all the answers. I often remind leaders that listening is not just about hearing words—it is about understanding the needs, concerns, and ideas of others. Leaders who truly listen build stronger relationships and make better-informed decisions.

Avoiding Isolation in Leadership

The myth of Narcissus also teaches us about the danger of isolation in leadership. Narcissus became so obsessed with his reflection that he cut himself off from others, leading to his demise. Similarly, when leaders allow ego to take over, they isolate themselves from their teams and trusted advisors. They stop seeking input, ignore feedback, and make decisions in a vacuum. This isolation often leads to burnout, poor choices, and a lack of accountability.

Great leaders build strong support networks—mentors, advisors, and colleagues who provide perspective and honest feedback. In my coaching practice, I encourage leaders to create these networks, whether through mentorship, peer groups, or fostering open dialogue with their teams. These relationships help leaders stay grounded and prevent the isolation that comes with unchecked ego.

Leading with Purpose

Finally, one of the most critical aspects of managing ego in leadership is maintaining a sense of purpose. Narcissus became so consumed by his own image that he lost sight of everything else. In leadership, when ego takes over, leaders can lose sight of their true mission—whether it is serving their team, achieving organisational goals, or making a positive impact.

Purpose-driven leaders keep their ego in check by reminding themselves of the bigger picture. They ask themselves:

• “How does this decision align with my values and my team’s needs?”

• “Am I acting in the best interest of the organisation, or am I letting personal ambition cloud my judgement?”

These reflections help leaders stay focused on what truly matters and avoid the pitfalls of self-obsession.

Final Thoughts

The myth of Narcissus offers a powerful warning about the dangers of ego in leadership. While confidence is necessary for success, when it turns into arrogance, it leads to isolation, poor decision-making, and the loss of trust from your team. By cultivating self-awareness, humility, and a strong sense of purpose, leaders can avoid the traps of ego and lead with integrity, collaboration, and vision.

As a leader, ask yourself:

• Are you focused on your own reflection, or on the needs of your team?

• Are you listening to the people around you, or isolating yourself from valuable input?

The answers to these questions will determine whether you lead effectively or fall into the same fate as Narcissus.

For more insights on leadership lessons from ancient myths, check out my new book, Wisdom of the Gods, available for sale now.